Once I read a great mystery series about an older lady who decided to use feeling invisible to her advantage. Invisible (Ivy Malone Mysteries) by Lorena McCourtney are a great set of books about a sweet little old lady who becomes a detective because she says no one notices her anyway. If you enjoy light humor and a good mystery then go read them. Easy reading too, not too deep, just pleasurable.
This is all in fun, but have you ever really felt invisible? I have these feelings all the time. Not in my family or close friends mind you, but out in the world. People just don’t acknowledge me, ever.
I frequently fly and not once has someone sitting beside me on the plane started up a conversation. I will even speak first, like hello. Nothing. These same people will start talking to nearby people like they are siblings! Same thing at work. I used to work at a hospital. I would go do x-rays all day long and as I walked the halls I would speak to the nurses and such. Sometimes I would get a “hi” back or a nod, but rarely more than that. If my co-worker went with me then people would come out of the woodwork to speak. Hey! How are you? What have you been up to? Conversations would be going on all around me, yet still no one would speak to me.
Hmmm, do I exist? Am I really standing here about to do an x-ray? Can they see me?? What is wrong with me?
My daughter said once that I am not very approachable. I do have resting bitch face (RBF), I agree. So I can accept that. People often think I am mad or upset when I really would not be.
BUT, here is the clincher for me. I play many online games. My favorites are Elvenar and War Dragons. I am members of fellowships or teams on these games, which basically is where you play with other people. There are often chats and emails that allow you to communicate with each other. I have noticed the same happens a lot on these games. I will join the chat messages and say good morning, or how are you guys doing? Nothing. No response at all. occasionally I will get a message back, but it is rare.
Once, I tried asking a question. I asked something like what do you guys like better, this or that, ( put in a game reference like culture building or something), and nothing! no response. It is really starting to get to me.
Like, at first it was funny, shockingly. But now seriously, what is going on. I am narcissistic and think that everyone should just speak and coddle me all the time. I know everything isn’t about me, the world doesn’t revolve around me. But is it too much to ask for someone to just speak and act like they see me?? Make me feel important or that I even exist.
Ok, rant over. People please! Speak to strangers you see, you never know the impact that can have on someone. Even if they have RBF (resting bitch face), even if they look unapproachable. Speak, smile, look them in the eye and show them that they matter.